Dear Carol,

You recently tried to console a woman who had an aversion to sperm and half jokingly suggested that she find a Tantra-practicing guy who can have orgasms without the release of sperm. Apparently, it can be a learned practice. Well, I used to produce almost all my orgasms without the use of Tantra or other meditative means and still not release the sperm. I used this method as a form of mess control and/or birth control for decades ever since I learned it at the age of 16. The method involves pressing on one's perineum just before and during orgasm so as to block the vas deferens from allowing the sperm to move on to the ejaculatory duct. I do not suggest that novices use this method for birth control as there is too much room for error about where, when, and how much pressure to apply, especially in the throes of passion. However, this young woman might want to practice this method of non-intercourse sex play in order to learn the proper technique, as long as there is no permanent damage being done to the boyfriend by using it. This latter point is actually my question to you, Carol. Is it safe for the male to use this perineum push method long-term?
-- PP

Dear PP,

Yes, unless one is pushing so hard that pain or irritation results -- in which case, lighten up on the pressure! This technique (which amounts to pinching closed the urethra, actually, not squeezing the vas) will result in a phenomenon called "retrograde ejaculation" in which the ejaculate, because it can't make its way out of the body the ordinary way, backs up into the bladder. It exits the body the next time you urinate -- not as pleasurably as it would during an ejaculation, perhaps. Then again, who am I to deny the pleasure of a really satisfying piss?

This method is actually a bit preferable if used for the "partner doesn't like sperm" reason than it would be for birth control. Regardless of whether a man ejaculates, if he is fertile at all, there may be live sperm in his pre-ejaculate that can escape and impregnate a female partner. Trapping them in a condom is a more foolproof method, although it sounds like you've been successful (or maybe lucky) so far.

Dear Dr. Queen,

Does masturbating too much affect my metabolism? Figuring that it affects my amount of testosterone, which may have something to do with metabolism...? I want to know if a decrease in masturbation will result in weight loss. I already know an increase in masturbation results in weightlessness, but that's another story.
-- Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,

First -- stop worrying about masturbating "too much." If you're doing it so much that you're not eating, it will definitely affect your metabolism. Other than that, you're courting, at the most, rusty social skills and RSI.

Masturbation is physical activity -- and some types of masturbation are, of course, more physical than others. It, like any exertion, will cause an increase in your breathing and heart rates, your body temperature, etc. In that sense, masturbating more -- not less -- will help you lose weight, though it's not a very fast weight-loss regimen. Well, unless you forget to eat.

Any regular physical activity will cause a small increase in testosterone. Jerking off will do it, but so will going for a walk. You didn't ask about this, but parenthetically, one study suggested that about half of all cases of erectile dysfunction were alleviated at least somewhat by increasing the study subjects' testosterone levels through regular exercise.

Testosterone builds protein, which increases muscle mass. This may result in weight gain, but muscle mass weight gain doesn't necessarily make you look heavier, and larger muscle mass increases your metabolism and allows you to burn calories faster. Unless you increase frequency or load (think weight-lifting here, not quantity of ejaculate), once a muscle reaches an efficient place, it will not continue to increase, and these effects will taper off.

So if you want to lose weight, masturbate instead of snacking, or go to the gym. Masturbation is not the most efficient form of exercise you could do. But it isn't making you gain weight, unless you have a fetish for eating cookies while you do it. And speaking of cookies, if you cut down on masturbation, it could heighten your stress level, and some people react to stress by eating.

See, we didn't create National Masturbation Month at Good Vibes just to sell sex toys. We keep telling you -- masturbation is good for you!

(I snagged this question off the ever-fabulous craigslist.com -- thanks to Craig and to Anonymous, as well as to Dr. Robert, who helped me explain this one.)